Wednesday, September 9, 2009
It's gonna be my day off today but annoyed that I need to stay here maybe till 10 am thats 8 hrs of duty and hoping that the meeting will not take 3 hours! I want to rest already and there are lots of things that I need to do. I am trying to fool my self by looking many time in the mirror trying to see if I have a fast beat of pulse on my neck (they say it would be one sign that your pregnant) and I dont see anything unsual at all !! Damn!! I am hoping for nothing again. I am beginning to lost patience and getting mad, annoyed, frustrated and sad! Need tos say more?! how I wish someone could talk to me and help me lift up my spirit. But I know if I try to open this open they would just all say the same thing "dont rush and it will come" F*** they don't know how it feels and how I just wanted them to just listen and hold me when I want to break down!!!